Last year at this time I had just gotten off the phone with Dr. Baker from the Breast Imagery clinic at Duke. I had an aggressive, early Stage 3 breast cancer and was about to begin a whirlwind of testing, biopsies and scheduling so I could begin chemotherapy as soon as possible. Well, actually we didn’t know all of those details at the time, but bottom line, he confirmed it was cancer. It would take a few weeks for all the details to shake out.
Last year at this time, the prospect of eight rounds of chemo filled me with dread, a double mastectomy to follow seemed like a nightmare, and being finished with radiation seemed like a distant dream.
But now it is all behind me! All the blood, sweat and tears are a thing of the past…at least most days.
What an emotional roller coaster this past year has been. So many “ups” — the love and support I received from my family and friends AND the peace and mercy that God provided me during this trial were very real..
If I had ever doubted the love of my family and friends, it was reaffirmed in a very clear way. My number one Love Language is SERVICE and when I was in bed for 9 months watching everyone take care of my family (and me), I knew in those moments that I was loved.
Every single card, phone call, comment, email…every meal, visit and gift…every prayer you prayed…I knew I was loved.
That is not to say that every day was sunshine and roses. It was hard to give up control. It was depressing not to be able to get out of bed. I hated the nausea. I hated that it hurt to walk. The surgery was painful. I hated most of all that I couldn’t take care of my kids like I wanted to.
But the Great Physician was taking care of me!
And now, one year later, I am trusting in Him that I am cancer free and well on the way to getting back to NORMAL. My hair is back. My appetite is back. 🙂 I take care of the kids on my own. I clean my house on my own (sometimes!). I cook meals on my own (most of the time). I have truly been blessed.
Today, I still tire very easily and I still visit the hospital much too frequently for my liking, but I am doing well! I met with one of my doctors on Monday and she feels like I am recovering “at or above average.”
I still have some upcoming procedures and surgeries that I am kind of dreading, but I will continue to take things one day at a time, and hopefully NEXT YEAR at this time, all of the dread will be a distant memory and I will only remember the good times!
Good times like this one…I said to the girls, “Kiss her on the cheek…” For once, they both listened. lol